shedontspeakbutsheremembers asked: Hi I'm Ari and I'd love to give you some feedback on "Off Button." I want to be thorough, and I have some other things I need to do, so you'll get it tomorrow at the very latest! Is that okay :D

Absolutely, thank you so much!

Can someone give me constructive criticism on the piece of writing I posted? It would mean a ton to me if I could get some feedback.

Off Button

The boy imagined words cascading from his fingertips. The boy imagined taking his skeleton out of its careful container and folding it into a cardboard box in his closet. The boy imagined his lips were sewn shut with thread. What agony it would be, to always say what you feel. What agony it would be, to always feel something concrete.
.
The boy dreamed of tendons and nerve endings, the boy dreamed of long manicured fingernails and straight white teeth. The boy dreamed of not dreaming, of a complete silence to contrast his constantly conjugating mind. The boy imagined taking his brain out of its careful container and compressing it into a plastic Tupperware. Because what agony it would be, to always be on. What agony it would be, to never stop.
.
The boy heard beeping. The boy heard his mother begging. The boy felt the metal of the hospital bed, the boy could not open his eyes. The boy remembered a bright red steering wheel, the boy remembered a crash, the boy wondered if he was alive, the boy wondered why he was.
The boy was sick of dreaming.
The boy was sick of himself.
The boy imagined pulling the plugs from their careful containers and folding them up inside his desk. Because what agony it would would be, if he had to wake up.

cyrusassists:


USEFUL TIPS & GUIDES FOR WRITERS, a masterlist by cyrusassists.
It came to my attention that people really like masterlists around this community, so I threw another one together. It’s not specifically for role-playing, as most of mine are, but everything I linked below was designed to help you with your writing, so you should probably check them out anyway.

Common mistakes in English writing.
The Guide to the Writing Process.
Describing a person: Adding Details.
Masterlist of choice generators, part one.
Masterlist of choice generators, part two.
How to end a novel with a punch.
The ultimate guide to Grammar and Writing.
Getting your writing done on an online program.
Useful profile sheet for creating characters!
Helpful for when there’s a word on tip of your tongue.
Back to Basics: Writing a Novel Synopsis.
25 ways to plot, plan and prep your story.
20 writing tips from fiction authors.
Short writing activities for beginners. [ESL learners]
How to use an outline to write a first draft.
25 ways to improve your vocabulary.
Using people-watching as a learning experience.
The DO’s and DON’T’s of adding description.
How to make simple writing more vivid.
Advice: How to perfect your writing.
Template for family tree planning.
The Writer’s Mary Sue Test!
How to create characters for your story.
A beautifully written guide to BODY LANGUAGE: EYES.
Plotting your novel, by Lee Masterson.
IUP Writing Center: Descriptive Writing.
Writing well-rounded characters.
Masterlist of guides to help describe someone/something.
Masterlist of positive character traits for your characters.
Heavenly sounds that help you relax + focus.
Grammar & style: ways to tighten up your writing.
Different music playlists to inspire you as you write.
Survey to help you with fully developing a character.
List of alternatives to overstated words.
Masterlist of flaws for your characters.
Steps to writing more and more.
A guide to role-playing/writing relationships.
Guide on staying in character.
Knowing when to stop: expectations for a satisfying ending.
Creating emotional frustration in your characters.
Writing out friendships between multiple characters.
Writing gender-specific dialogue.
Writing for the young adult audience.
Write fiction that grabs the readers from day one.
Finding solid names for your unique characters.
7 ways to make a good story great.
Story Structure: Skipping Time Between Scenes. [x]
How NOT to start your story.
Masterlist of 140 character guides.
Resource blog for writers, #1.
Resource blog for writers, #2.
Resource blog for writers, #3.
Resource blog for writers, #4.
Resource blog for writers, #5.
A lot more writing blogs.
This got pretty long, so I’ll insert the rest beneath the cut!
Read More

cyrusassists:

USEFUL TIPS & GUIDES FOR WRITERS, a masterlist by cyrusassists.

It came to my attention that people really like masterlists around this community, so I threw another one together. It’s not specifically for role-playing, as most of mine are, but everything I linked below was designed to help you with your writing, so you should probably check them out anyway.

This got pretty long, so I’ll insert the rest beneath the cut!

Read More

She talks to me about “claiming him first” and obviously by girl rules i can’t go after him but like, he’s not a pint of oj you put in your shopping cart, he gets a say in this shit

wrasslers:

do you wanna look like this skeleton

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or THIS skeleton?

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drink a milk kids

tagged: +About me  +funny shit 

opalesent:

I want 0 responsibilities and a lot of lingerie

tagged: +about me 

elestiel:

GIVE ME A TITLE IN MY ASKBOX

  • QUEEN/KING OF _____???
  • PRINCESS/PRINCE OF _____???
  • EMPRESS/EMPEROR OF _____???

bonus points:

  • HEIR TO _____???
  • GOD/GODDESS OF _____???
  • OVERLORD OF _____???
  • GUARDIAN/PROTECTOR OF ____???
  • THE PATRON SAINT OF ____???
  • MASTER/MISTRESS OF ____???

stability:

actual footage of dogs when there are no people around

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